life lessons

OK big surprise here... wait for it...

alcohol makes you stupid!!!!!

i know i am stating the obvious but when i went out on sat night to a fiends bday i had a few glasses of wine and i was talking to new people who i hadn't met before and i could have sworn i felt my IQ dropping, so god knows what they thought of me ( i don't really care as i probably won't ever see them again) but still

when i get drunk i get very tactile, so expect hugs when around me, i also get quite giggly and the aforementioned stupidity.


this is why i don't drink much....

mental dioherra

because sometimes you just shouldn't talk.

so last night had nice snuggly night in with bf, and we're all relaxed and its getting quite late I've been at work all day, (which isn't me justifying myself ,ok well it is, but i want all things taken into consideration) and we're talking and he says a little comment that makes me think, nothing too important but it just gets to me, so my mind goes into hyper drive and inevitably bf asks what i'm thinking,

now as this is a new relationship i don't want to bottle things up, so i tell him whats on my mind, and then i start rambling so i am literally saying the first thing that comes into my head in a long line of crazy tohguhts, which if i were wide awake in the middle of the day not completly relaxed i wouldn't have said.

i made a huge rookie (which in all fairness i pretty much am) mistake instead of slowly exposing your other half to the craziness and not blurt it out in one long ramble, i went straight in there and turned into a complete neurotic mess. ...sigh.

so now instead of being, woot new girlfriend, who is nice and funny and smart and huggable, i fear i have now turned into a crazy ranting insecure and neurotic loon in his eyes, and i do care what he thinks and how he perceives me because he is my boyfriend so it matters,

now to be fair i'm probably really over reacting and bf said the next morning that he wasn't thinking about it so it didn't bother him.

but still i am far much saner this morning and i am just cursing myself, this blog being the big slap on the forehead "ah crap".

sometimes i just forget that it is a new relationship and that he is a person with different feelings than mine and that we haven't set out all those mental boundaries of what is 'too far', and i know that sounds really terrible, of course he's a real person and i see him as such and he is lovely blah blah blah

but sometimes i just can't help myself and the crazy comes pouring out, so i will be saner and next time he asks me what i'm thinking, i must learn to think before i say,.

and i now realise this blog makes very little sense i will try and go back and make it into whole sentences honest but it More of me venting than anything.

vampires

metalsunflower has inspired me to continue her recent post about vampires, of course all vampire lore is different and we have nothing really concrete to base this all on blah blah blah but i wirte what i have gleamed form watching many a vampire film/tv/book/general

for general research watch buffy and angel lol
but also if you want to look at the historical side then you may wantto look at
countess bathory, she is known as the bloody countess known for her liking to kill young owman and bathe in her blood to keep her young.

an interesting article can be found here http://www.crimelibrary.com/serial_killers/predators/bathory/hobby_2.html

vampires have been romanticised alot throguh anne rice books and just in general and to that there is an appeal who really wants to know the true brutality of a predator who hunts you. for that you have werewolves :)

sometying most agree on is that they all heal very fast, exceptions come in when silver is involved
the Anita Blake books by laurelk hamilton are fantastic go read,

in the Anita Blake book all vampires can heal wounds as long as molten silver isn't poured in that stops it form healing

ways to kill vampires tend to be unanimous, get the head or severe the head from the spinal cord. how you do this is hobson's choice, in various lore the heart must be pierced with wood, hence a stake but a head can be decapitated any way i believe.

more later
anything you particulaly want to know let me know :)

xxxxxxxxxxx

just a quickie

just a quick update on my life, its all pretty damn good,

i have lovely new boyfriend ( who doesn't bite my gums as much as he used to :), and i'm putting that down to over enthusiasm :))
so i'm all happy and smiley, and also quite sickening i realise for this i apologise, i won't stop but i do apologise.

i have been trying to do arty things with some success but i should be doing more possibly making moulds of my face we'll see but yes all is good and well, and just quickly thank you to kirsten and rach who are wonderful and amzing and each deserve huge glomps :)

possible next post tattoos? i think this sounds like a plan and a half :)

hope ur all good in the cyber world
xxxxx